Friend
Throughout our lifetime, we call many people by the name “friend�. Though many of these are casual acquaintances, some do truly last for a lifetime. The question is not how many friends do you have, but rather how many people are you a friend to?

This thought came into my mind as I recently contacted a friend from my high school days. We fell out of contact ten years ago, through no fault of hers, but because I decided I would go forward in my life and leave everything behind me, including Laura. Though she had been a great friend and helped me through some tough times, I stubbornly turned away from her for stupid reasons, mistakenly believing that she could be replaced.
We roamed the halls of Southern Alamance High School together. We hung out at her house (her brother Daniel was one of my best friends), around town, and she deeply cared about her friends, including me. Ten years later, after realizing you can’t replace a great Christian friend, I broke down and wrote her an email, after getting the email address from her mother. After struggling to find the perfect way to say, “I’m an idiot for turning my back on you�, I finally hit the send button, but wondered what response, if any, I would get from her. Soon after, she emailed me back, accepting my apology and receiving her long lost friend back.

The more I thought about it, the more I could see Laura personifying the example of Christ. Christ loved Peter and accepted him back, even though Peter denied knowing Him. He gave us the parable of the Prodigal Son to show how God takes us back, even after we have turned our backs on Him. The truest signs of a loving friendship were found in the actions and the words of Jesus.

I realize that I don’t want to fail God in this area. I want to be able to say that I am a friend of God and a good friend to my friends as well. We have to examine this and see if we are true friends. If we are supposed to reflect Christ in “all� areas of our lives, then friendship is included. So, what does it mean to be a friend?

F â€" Faithful

The writer of Hebrews reminds us in Hebrews 13:5 that God has promised, “I will never leave thee; nor will I forsake thee.� A true friend doesn’t leave when times are hard, turn when there is a disagreement, or walk away for good when feelings get hurt. If God had done that to us, we wouldn’t have a shot. A true friend remains faithful at all times.

R â€" Respect

Jesus tells us that friendship includes respect as well. To be a friend of Jesus, respect is a key component as He instructed us in John 15:14 when He said, “You are My friends if you do what I command you.� Do you respect the commands of Christ? Do you respect your friends or do you tend to treat them disrespectfully? A true friend respects you for who you are and respects your opinions, even if they disagree with your opinion.

I â€" Intimate

Friends share an intimate relationship, sharing their hearts, their fears, and their dreams. I look at the picture of Jesus in the upper room with His disciples and He washes their feet and helps them understand what He is preparing to endure. He wept at the death of Lazarus, showing the depths of the intimate relationship that they had. He desires that type of friendship with us, but too often we neglect Him as we do our earthly friends as well. We stay guarded in many areas of our lives, but true friends allow those walls to be broken down. If we desire a friendship with Jesus, the walls have to fall down.

E â€" Excited about seeing your friend

Are there people that you claim are your friends, yet you dread to spend time with them? I know the feeling. There have been people who I’ve used the term “friend� to describe, knowing that they were about as enjoyable as a root canal. John says in chapter 20 that the disciples were “overjoyed� when Jesus appeared to them after His resurrection. You know Jesus was excited as well. Are you excited to see Jesus in your life? If we are truly excited to see Christ, then we will look for Him in every situation of life, not wanting to miss a moment. When your friends want to spend time with you, are you excited or is it more of a burden? A true friend finds excitement in every chance they get to see that friend.

N â€" Navigator through dangers

Quality friends are not afraid to stand up and tell their friends when they are wrong. Proverbs 27:6 says “Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.� Yes, it hurts to be told that we are wrong, but when a friend tells us that, it shows that he/she cares about what happens to us. Those who don’t care will not try to stop us from making mistakes. Look at the example that Jesus gave us. Whenever the disciples acted inappropriately, He quickly reprimanded them, such as the instance when they tried to keep the children away from Him. It was not that He didn’t care or was trying to hurt them, He was trying to teach them. Look at your friends and see how you can be a navigator for them in their Christian walk. Look and see where you need Jesus to be your navigator, too.

D â€" Dedicated

Jesus gave the words and the example, one that few of us will actually follow. John 15:13 says, “Greater love has no one than this, that one lays down his life for his friends.� And He did. Are you willing to lay down your life for your friends? Are you willing to look past your own wants and needs and in turn elevate your friends above yourself? Normally, people are our friends when they say and do what we want them to do, but are quickly disposed of hen they fail to meet our needs. Laying down your life for a friend doesn’t just mean to die for them but also to elevate them above yourself.

Look at each area of friendship and see how good of a friend you are to your friends. Look, more importantly, to see if you are a true friend of Christ. Laura personified all these things to me, which in turn caused me to examine how good of a friend I was to her and to Christ. I’ve found that I have a lot of work to do. When we are true friends with to Christ and to others, then we fulfill Jesus’ command to “love one another.�

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